naurwenseaflame: (Cities)
[personal profile] naurwenseaflame
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A bit of a longer story but I'll try to make it short.
A penpal from England (we're definitely not in touch anymore) had basically begged me to visit her when she got to know I'd be going to Ireland in summer. That was years ago by the way.
I'd met her once before - for a couple of hours - we got along really well, so I agreed and scratched my money together to be able to afford the extra flight.

She was all enthusiastic, invited me, told me how she would take me to visit places, etc. totally excited, almost hyper.

However once I was *there* she was permanently p***** off at me and I really had no clue why.
She hinted how she had to *drive so much* to take me to places (they were are more or less nearby and the visit was for 3 days). How we had to do food shopping which obviously really annoyed her (I paid my share). We didn’t really get to chat or anything – it was either a word here or there or nothing.
She took me to some christening in her family that I didn’t want to go to. FFS, it was family business and seriously, I wasn’t interested in sitting in a church for an event I wasn’t involved with at all, listening to someone talking about sins and other *fun stuff*. Everyone looked at me as if I was a two-headed donkey cause nobody could figure out who I was and why I was there at all. And it lasted the whole morning. Even greater.
Long story made short, after the holiday she wrote me an email how she felt I hadn’t behaved well during my stay, how I hadn’t been friendly to her relatives (WTF???), how I’d been unthankful even though she (and her husband) drove me around… and so on.

I told her my side of the story. And I never heard from her again.
Through a mutual friend of ours I heard that after a meet up with her she’d had similar experiences… :(
And also heard that she asked about me once or twice. Like *why doesn’t she write to me anymore*.
Errr… seriously?

Date: 2010-05-06 11:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Sorry for the random comment here but I just want to say, I hate when stuff like that happens. Reminds me of this time I was visiting a friend when I was younger and said friend's mum was acting strangely the entire weekend. Eventually my friend said she was sick of how her mother was treating her, then afterwards the mum seemed to blame me for some reason and apparently later on said she didn't think I should ever visit again after what had happened last time. It seriously confused the hell out of me.. I wasn't even involved so... yeah, people can be weird. Not sure if this was all that related-- sorry, lol.

Date: 2010-05-06 11:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hey, thanks for your comment. I don’t mind at all. :D
Sounds way familiar even if a different situation.
The whole situation with that one from England confused the hell out of me, too. Because I really couldn’t figure out what had gone wrong.
Until I found out that she DOES treat people like that – as a rule. And that she’s rather selfish (other situations not mentioned here) and so on. She mistreated a friend of mine quite badly, too, so… at least that explained it to me.

Date: 2010-05-06 11:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh dear :(( You are going to be very warmly welcomed when you come over in May and I can't wait to take you to Glastonbury :))))

Date: 2010-05-06 11:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I’m sure this will be WAY different. ;D
And I’m sure you won’t complain how you *had to go to Glastonbury cause of me*. LOL

That holiday was truly a nightmare. I dreaded every single second of it. :(
Imagine… she lived near Bath and I never even saw anything of the city. Everything was really weird. She couldn’t be bothered going there but to two shops.

Date: 2010-05-06 11:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
WTF?!!! Indeed! Has she seen a shrink?

Date: 2010-05-06 11:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
not that I know of, but I came to the conclusion that she definitely needed one...

Date: 2010-05-06 12:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
She really does! =S
I can only imagine how awful those days must have been for you... =(

Date: 2010-05-06 12:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
thank you!
they were... even more so because I didn't understand what was going on and why.
I remember now that she kept complaining about other penpals... I guess she just IS like that...

Date: 2010-05-06 01:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I don't even think she could understand why herself... =S

Date: 2010-05-06 11:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh, my, what an experience.

I actually have a similar one: my friend's friend invited both of us to stay with her in New York, but when we arrived, she seemed ashamed to have two whites in her apartment (she was of Nigerian origin) and bluntly told us to leave and not show up any time she was expecting company. It was ... interesting, and very stressful for my friend.

Date: 2010-05-06 11:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
ouch ;( that's horrible, I hope you had a way better time in NY without her

Date: 2010-05-06 11:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I was actually OK because I did not care about her at all. My poor friend was depressed most of the time. We still managed to enjoy NY, it's an awesome city!

Date: 2010-05-06 12:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That's good, yeah your friend was probably upset for you, but it wasn't her fault at all
that's good ;) I soo want to go I have cousin's living there ;)
Just flights are a bit expensive for me
Love the icon by the way ;)

Date: 2010-05-06 12:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Thanks, I love it too :) Check out [ profile] ravenstar_icons for such goodies!

About half a year ago you could get really cheap flights to NY, now the prices have gone up a bit. Still, they're about a third of the price I paid when I first flew to the US (back in the 1990s).

Date: 2010-05-06 12:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
will do thank you ;)
I'll check them out and start saving up.
Thank you so much x

Date: 2010-05-06 11:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
oh goodness
how rude is that?
and... i mean... she knew you were whites, so... why did she invite you in the first place? :(

Date: 2010-05-06 12:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Yeah, I was asking myself the very same question. I actually asked *her* in the end (I'm rather blunt). She just stared at me like the cow she was.

Date: 2010-05-06 12:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I hope she felt at least somewhat ashamed for her behaviour... :(

Date: 2010-05-06 11:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
sounds like a real bitch ;( *Hugs*

Date: 2010-05-06 11:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
thank you
t'was my very first visit of England and I felt like blargh@england for a long time - until I revisited. thanks to that cow...

Date: 2010-05-06 11:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I remember you telling me about a horrilble experience with someone. I'm glad you came back and have enjoyed it since

Date: 2010-05-06 11:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
yeah, it was this one...
I remember telling you. ;)

Date: 2010-05-06 12:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
charming :0(

Date: 2010-05-06 12:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
totally... :(

Date: 2010-05-06 03:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
wow, how annoying!

Fortunately I've only had great experiences with meeting my penpals, but I did have a not so good experience with an exchange student from France: while she was at my place, she basically wanted my father to drive her everywhere all the time, even in the middle of the night when she "needed" to go to parties. However when I was at her place she always went out with her friends and left me alone at home or at school where I'd have to figure out how to return to her place. Thankfully her parents were really nice (I don't know how they could have such a rude daughter) and I just spent the time with them!

Date: 2010-05-06 06:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
wow, that girl must have been a piece of work for her parents! :o
awful behaviour. she sounds very much on the spoiled side...

but great you had very good expriences on holidays only. mine were usually MUCH more pleasant than *that one*. :)

Date: 2010-05-06 07:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That's good to hear! And at least you know you did nothing wrong because this girl did the same thing to other people!

Date: 2010-05-06 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
and that was a definitely good thing, finding that out. because I really, totally honestly didn't know what I could have done wrong.
wait, I know now, i went to visit her AT ALL... :p

Date: 2010-05-06 04:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh lovely ... that girl definitely needs to see a shrink!

How long did it take for you to get over the experience and visit the UK again?

Date: 2010-05-06 06:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
a long time, actually... or a long time for me considering the fact that I actually like the UK VERY much... back then it was my first and last visit for a couple of years.
the next visit was when I went to meet up with Amanda (hedgewytch on here, me thinks you know her?) in Oxford.

Date: 2010-05-06 06:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
*hugs* Oh dear, that does sound awful... not to mention awfully weird!

Date: 2010-05-06 06:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
thank you!
I'm so glad it's been a long time by now.
it really bugged me for a long time - but not anymore now.

love the icon - again LOL

Date: 2010-05-06 07:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I find things like this almost funny if they've happened to me a long time ago. But while they're happening... arrgh.

And thanks! Glad you like the arguing huskies. This is what happens when puppies get annoying, but the big dogs are much gentler than they look!
Edited Date: 2010-05-06 07:57 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-05-06 09:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
yeah, by now I just find it hilarious.
but back then it really confused me and it was just awful...



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